Sunday, July 01, 2007

I'm scared

If you have been following my story at all, we are on a two month break from using science in our hopes to having a baby. It's been a nice two months off. I haven't missed filling my body with hormones, getting ultra-sounds, giving blood etc. But now we have to get ready for another fill of reality......what's next? We will try one more IUI but it that doesn't work (we aren't optimistic) then we need to make a decision.....Are we ready to try IVF? Which doctor do we want to use? How are we going to pay for it? How are we going to get through it?
I'm trying so hard to put my faith in God to guide us through these decisions. I also I'm praying for strength because I'm finding myself in tears more often than I'd like.
I'll talk about this more (lucky you!) but I just need to get that down on "paper"..... I'm scared.


Rachel said...

I would be scared if I was in your shoes too! :-(

But God WILL provide. Unfortunately not always in our ways and timing. But I pray that if you have to make a decision about IVF (and I hope you don't!) that you will KNOW without a doubt the peace you will need to venture through it.

Anonymous said...

Have you thought about adopting? I am not sure where you stand on that, but for a lot of couples who are having troubles conceiving, adoption is something that gives them hope, a chance to give a child a wonderful life that they otherwise would not have had. My friends tried to conceive for 5 years, and they didn't want to adopt. They are now 6 months away from adopting a baby from Asia, and I have never seen them more excited or hopeful.

ptg said...

I am so, so sorry to hear (read) about all the problems you are having. You and your husband will make wonderful parents one day!

Elizabeth said...

So I first read this post not long after you wrote and I've been trying to figure out what to type to you. What can I, a stranger on the internet, say to you in such a stressful and emotional time?

My realization is that there is nothing I can say that will comfort you other than this: I'm praying for you and your husband. I'm praying for you to not lose hope. God will take care of you. Though I know nothing else, that is something of which I am 100% certain.

Hang in there.