Maybe I'm trying too hard to keep them on a schedule and making sure they are sleeping in their cribs and eating over 4 oz. Maybe I'm expecting too much out of them. But I'm trying to do it right.
People ask me if I'm getting sleep. I am, but the schedule is hard to get use to. Jaime gets home at 5 pm and takes over. I go to bed at 6 pm and sleep until midnight. Then he goes to bed and I take over, from midnight until 6 pm that night. It works, but it's lonely during the night shift. My very loyal cat hangs out with me but when Anna screams, she runs and hides. I would too if I could.
I have been getting a lot of help from my mom and mother in law - Thank you! But I haven't been good at just getting out and leaving the babies. I feel like I need to stay with them. When they are sleeping or being held by someone else I am cleaning, taking a shower or I just sit and try to catch my breath.
Yesterday I finally just left. My mother in law and cousin were over and the babies were kinda sleeping. I got on my running shoes and grabbed my ipod and went for a run. That's right, I went for a run. I haven't run since we started IVF which was almost a year ago. It was a slow run but it was wonderful. I actually went for about 30 minutes. It was hard to get use to the jiggling going on in my stomach. Hopefully my Dr. isn't reading this because I haven't been released to run yet. It's only been 5 weeks. I will make sure I get out again soon.
My emotions and hormones have been getting the best of me. Some days I'm fine, other days I'm a mess. I know that is normal and I am trying my best to keep them in check. One thing I'm trying to work on is socializing. I really don't have any desire to leave or see other people. I only want to be around my mom. This is very weird for me. I love to socialize and be around other people. Right now I just want my mommy. I don't know why I feel like this. I love my family and friends but I just feel comfortable being at home taking care of Anna and Luke. My mom has been getting me out for walks which has been helping. We also had lunch at Alterra and the Milwaukee Ale House. That was nice. It's all about baby steps.
Overall things are going good. Anna and Luke are now 5 weeks old and are very healthy. And it looks like they are ready to eat again. I'll post some more pictures soon.