Zoe was born on Saturday. She stopped breathing a couple times but was stable in the NICU by Saturday afternoon. Dr's weren't sure why she stopped breathing and didn't think it was related to the heart condition. Zoe got better over the weekend and into Monday. Then on Tuesday we were given the biggest blow....... Zoe has Trisomy 18. If you don't know much about it you can click on that link. Basically it's an extra chromosome. Much like Trisomy 21 (which is also known as Down Syndrome) but it's fatal. Couple days, maybe a couple months.
Today I met my niece Zoe. They let her leave the NICU because at this point she is off most machines. This way we can all be with her whenever we want. She has her own room on the children's floor. There are beds in the rooms for parents to stay. My dad, brother and the three oldest kids (high school age) got to hospital and we went to the family lounge with my mom. Greg (brother in law) brought in the little boys - Ethan and Aidan (4 and 3) and we waited. My sister got Greg to show him Zoe in her new room. Then they kinda took us in groups to see Zoe. I went in with my mom and Aidan and Ethan came running out of the room yelling, "Auntie Tracey come see baby Zoe!" My sister was rocking Zoe. Aidan and Ethan were so excited to see their little sister. They were touching her and hugging her and kissing her. I lost it. I felt sick. I stayed in there for a bit, held her hand and I just couldn't keep it together so I left. I went back to the lounge and sobbed hysterically with my dad and brother.
Everyone left to take kids to work etc. So I packed up my bag and went back into the room and sat with my sister and Zoe. My sister just rocked her and kissed her and rocked her more. We talked a bit. I helped her get settled in her room. I stayed until 6:00. Jaime and I are going to go tomorrow afternoon and bring dinner for my sis.
The hospital said they can stay there as long as they need. They had to discuss with doctors if they want to treat infections, be put on life support etc.
Jenny is doing good. I don't like using the word good, how can anyone be good? But she is being real strong. She just wants things as normal as they can be for her. Greg just keeps saying, we are living in today. We can't live knowing she is going to die. We have to love her and make her happy.
She is beautiful. She is so small. She is long and skinny. She opens her eyes when she hears other people. She does have a loud cry. I just can't believe she is going to die. It just doesn't make any sense in my head. I just have to keep telling myself that she is going to a much better peaceful place and we will all be with her again in heaven. She gets to meet Jesus before any of us.
Here is my brother in law's blog if you would like to see pictures of Zoe.